If a young woman can’t even date your son without being threatened, what is life going to be like when she marries him? A while back, Aaron Gouveia made some observations on The Good Men Project about “The Rules” that every father supposedly follows when a boy is dating his daughter.“The idea of dad polishing his gun while meeting the new boyfriend is often the lazy commentary when it comes to how fathers will handle their daughters dating.”We believe this commentary is just as harmful in perpetuating stereotypes.When we go to the park, my son tries to find other kids to play with; he can normally be seen running around with a couple of kids almost instantly.However, my daughter will normally be seen off by herself somewhere.It was fun to watch our kids run all over the place and play.My kids couldn’t be more different when it comes to playing.My son likes to play rough, warlike games with lots of running – pretty stereotypical.My daughter, on the other hand, prefers a much more calm form of play.
The much-anticipated introduction is an unending fountain of humor for friends and family, but it’s more often an occasion for horror for the young man. In today’s ideal scenario, she brings home a guy the whole family can love, and the rest is matrimony. How about if she moved and met her man far away from home?
It actually makes for a dangerous situation because God means for spiritual headship and leadership to be a more seamless handoff, not this disjointed affair that leaves the young woman spiritually and emotionally uncovered from age fifteen until her wedding day.
We’ve relegated dads to a last-minute interview before engagement when God meant for them to be active, available agents of wisdom and safekeeping. Foolish dads relish the gun-bearing, tough-guy role.
The wise dads relish the opportunity to develop a real, intentional, grace-and-truth relationship with the man who might be tasked with caring for their daughter for the rest of her life.
In the first pages of Scripture, we find that great love story of Isaac and Rebekah.